Week 7 Chapter 6
Read in your book page 117. Then think about specific times that cause you pain to think about. This chapter is about healing, please don't skip this.
Write down in a list three
Sin or Offense Against You then Pain and Consequences
1.
2.
3.


Question 2. Number these steps of forgiveness in the order you think will bring the healthiest long-term resolution.
___ Forgive the consequences of the act done against you.
___ Distinguish between forgiving and trusting your offender.
___ Tell God what happened to you.
_1__ Admit something happened.
___ Seek reconciliation, not just conflict resolution.
___ Forgive the offender (when he or she repents) for their sake.
___ Forgive the offender for your sake.

Question 3. Read page 118-119.
Revisit the three sins or offenses you mentioned in question 1. In what ways (if any) did the pain you felt then distort life and cause you to make unhealthy decisions later ?

Questions 4 - 10. In the following questions, we'll share the steps of forgiveness( check this order with what you wrote for question 2).
I will write the correct order . After each one I suggest that you journal a little bit about why this would be the order and how it affects you. The actual book questions are basically that.

2.
6.
3.
1.
7.
5.
4.


After the DVD experience we will answer these questions together in our group.

Forgiving questions

1. Describe a time when admitting something was done to you was critical to your healing.


2. What makes it difficult to admit something was done to you ?


3. Describe ways forgiveness has healed you from sin done against you.


4. Why do you think it's crucial to forgive others for the consequences of their actions against us ?


5. You can invite others in your group to suggest a new question for you to answer.

week Six : Freedom (pages 98-106) Chapter Five : The Sweetest Gift of Grace : Repentance (pages 99-116 Truefaced Experience )

Question 1. (read Truefaced page 111 and remind yourself how trust attracts grace.) Then read Truefaced page 99 the last paragraph , especially.

What a great image for what repentance feels like! Try your hand at defining repentance with a similar word picture:

If we're........


then repentance is........

Question 2. read Truefaced pg 99 again. When we don't know how to deal with our sins, we will try to hide it. That's why The Room of Good Intentions turns into such a masquerade ball ! It's dress-up time ! We know what we've done.....we know what we do. And no amount of sadness, striving, or penance has done anything but compound our sadness. What we really need is a way home. We've been told to confess our sin, but we don't like that answer. We want to do something ! Besides, we've confessed our sin a thousand times before, and what good did it do?

For several chapters, we've looked at alternative ways to deal with our sin, all ultimately ineffective. From those chapters and from the quote above, what are some of those ways ?


Here are three more ways to deal with sin:
* Remorse- Bitter regret or moral anguish arising from repentance for past misdeeds.
* Mortification- A feeling of shame , humiliation, or wounded pride.
* Penance - A voluntary act of humiliating your self in order to express sorrow for sin.

Why are all of these ways ultimately ineffective?


Question 3. Read truefaced pages 101-102 (the part that describes a scenario that many of us know so well when we try to manage our own sin.)

Does this approach to sin management sound familiar to you ? Has there been a time when you tried- really tried- to end a bad habit or stop committing a reoccurring sin, but you failed ? If so, describe it.



Has Truefaced given you a new hope?

Why?





Question 4. Read Truefaced pages 100-101 Willpower is no power, segment.

Why do you think attempts at sin management ultimately fail?

How are you left feeling when sin management fails............again?


Question 5. read again pgs 100-101 about what is our goal.

We believe that the only effective way to deal with sin is repentance. What makes repentance a gift of God's grace instead of an act of my own willpower?


Why is it effective when other strategies are not?

Explain.

Study the passages below to discover the Bible's view of "sin management" and human willpower versus the powerful gift of grace in repentance. Note what you think is important from each passage:


*Isaiah 64:6



*Luke 18:14



*1 John 1:7-2:2



Question 6. Read pg 103 first paragraph.

To repent means to admit to myself , to God, and to selected others what is true about me- the whole truth. You can be shamed into repentance or dragged into a sort of repentance at the end of a guilt trip or an act of self-humiliation. But those are never the tactics of grace. Grace invites you to receive repentance as a gift. In the process, grace-powered repentance actual resolves your sin, and thus sets you on the road to maturity. Here are five things that are true when grace produces repentance. These are five beautiful truths!

Truth 1: Repentance is about trusting -not willing.

Truth 2: Trusting God attracts grace's power to transform us, as we repent.

Truth 3: Trusting God with ourselves allows us to receive unconditional love and feel safe enough to remove our masks in repentance.

Truth 4: The safety we feel inclines us to stop defending ourselves, and it opens our hearts to God instead.

Truth 5: Every act of repentance depends upon an act of redemption.

Select one of these truths and explain why it is a revolutionary way for you to see repentance.






Select one of these truths and explain what makes it such a beautiful gift for you to receive.



Question 7. Meditate on the apostle Paul's words to Titus, describing what happens when we walk off the well-worn path of Pleasing God and start walking down the road of Trusting God.

In the book they have used the translation from the MSG Bible.
Titus 3:3-7





In this Scripture , underline everything God does to resolve our sin issues for us, then circle everything we do to resolve our sin issues for ourselves.


Meditate on these truths for a moment before continuing.

8.By now you know that people in The Room of Good Intentions hold radically different assumptions about how to handle sin than those in The Room of Grace. The environment of the first room actually inhibits repentance, while the second one releases it. Notice three specific inhibitors of repentance. (Truefaced , page 106)

Consider three factors that can interfere with your move to repentance: isolation, pride and wrong motive. According to the authors and your own observation, explain.

Why isolation inhibits your repentance.

How pride inhibits your repentance.

How wrong motives inhibit your repentance.

Now list two things that can lead you to repentance. ( see Romans 2:4 and 2 Corinthians 7:10-11)

9.Resolve striving to please God begets a pride that keeps us focused on our own "power" - which is not a power to write home about. In contrast, repentance that comes from God is outfitted with otherworldly power-potency secured by Jesus' death and activated by his resurrection. Repentance is formidable against sin only because of actual power- the power of the Cross. Our words or religious techniques have nothing to do with it. The power in this gift reminds us of the power in the ark of the covenant, a power so mighty that the Hebrews dared not come in contact with it. The same power that resided in the ark is the power in this gift. But now, God invites us to come near his grace - wrapped power. (Truefaced page 107)


What is more likely to inhibit you from opening the gift of repentance: isolation, pride, or wrong motive?

Explain.

Being aware of this weakness is a valuable insight.
Pause to pray about it, inviting Grace to focus her awesome power in disarming your isolation, pride, or motives.
Pray Romans 2:4 and 2 Corinthians 7:10-11 into the voids of your heart. Anticipate tasting how sweet repentance really is !

10. One day this woman stands near the door, waiting for the next wounded soul to stumble in so she can be one of the first to tell the new story of this gift.....a gift"used quite routinely in the community". When failing strivers stumble into a community of grace, safety, and vulnerable repentance, it radically disrupts their game plan. Suddenly, they are face to face with a real, tangible option of sweet freedom. And the ongoing environment of the community tells them that they have not dreamed up this way of life. As the community treats them as they have never been treated before, their confidence grows that grace can support the full weight of their sin. (Truefaced, page 109)


From the paragraph above, how can living in a community of grace affect someone? Underline several effects.

If you really believed that "grace can support the full weight of [your ] sin, "
what would you do about it?



Repentance Questions

1. Have you experienced a time when repentance failed in The Room of Good Intentions?

Explain.

2. Have you experienced repentance working when it was about trusting, not willpower?

Explain.

3. What does it look like when people try to manage their sin?

4. When did you experience " freedom" as a result of personal repentance?

Week Five Chapter Four (read THE SUPREME GIFT OF GRACE: LOVE )

question 2 I answered in my book. Here is the list written in the book. We are to reflect on each item and decide is something we feel we need and to what degree.
From I don't need this at all -Nice but Not necessary-I want this-I need this-This is an important need- This is a critically important need.
a.vacation
b.Increased income
c. Less stress
d.Better physical fitness
e. To be accepted
f. affirmation from peers
g. advice on a decision
h. Someones counsel on a personal struggle
i. Attention/listening from spouse or close friend
j. Time alone with God
k. Deeper connecting/communication at home
l. Help overcoming an unhealthy addiction.

question 3 I wrote out the scriptures that support the truth that God meets my needs and posted it on the blog that is titled simply Truefaced.
click Truefaced and scroll to March 11

Why did God create us with needs ?

How does it feel when told by someone that they do not need your help ?

What happened to the concern, compassion, and love that motivated you to offer your help in the first place?

What does this tell you about the purpose of having needs?

Did someone step forward to help meet that need?

Describe how that felt. How did you respond?
question 4 (page 83)
The question refers to step three (page 87 Truefaced) and asks us to consider similarities in our lives to Ricks.

Question 5. On step four: I let you love me. ( page 89 Truefaced)
As I read the pages of the book I also took note of the footnotes, and then I went to the back of the book and found scriptures to go along with the thought.
Here on step Four I found the most important part has not been overlooked by our Truefaced authors, the scripture passages to look up are Eph. 5:21 And, according to verses 18-20, it is evidence of a Spirit-filled life. I quote from the back of the book and now I quote from the book where the foot note has been placed at the end of this sentence. Learning to let others love us on their terms is part of what it means to "submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. footnote 13.

The degree to which I let you love me is the degree to which you can love me, no matter how much love you have for me.....We cannot let another person love us unless we trust the person. People who are unable to trust will never experience love. Ever..........Many people who deeply want to be loved are not loved, because they won't turn that doorknob of Humility ---"trusting God and others with me." They stand out in the cold, outside The Room of Grace, in pain ( and blame) because people don't love them..... The people God wants to use to love you deeply and to meet your needs stand right on the other side of that door. Turn the knob. (Truefaced, pages 90-91)

Question 5 According to this quote , and from your own experience:
(a) Why do you think it is so difficult for some of us to let others love us ?

(b) In order to receive your love, I must trust you. Agree or dis-agree? Explain.

(c) In order to receive your love, I must be humble. Agree or dis-agree? Explain.

(d) Who is receiving your love?

(e) Whose love are you receiving?

Question 6. Step five states: I let you love me on your terms-not mine.

Do you have a friend who struggles with a weakness that is one of your strengths?

The book gives some examples. I suggest writing down some of your strengths and then answer the question.

What initiative do you sense God nudging you to take to love this friend by meeting his or her need ?

Now think about someone you close to you----someone you love.
* What are one or two of this person's current needs or weaknesses?
* What are one or two practical ways you might meet those needs or come alongside to strengthen those weaknesses ?
*How will you handle potential reluctance to your offer of love?

Question 7. On to step six : I am fulfilled when I experience love.

Try to identify one current pain or longing that you are dealing with. Don't fret over its "size." No pain is too big or too small. Just summarize it here.


You may be feeling discouraged at this point, wondering where these ideal friends of yours are. Maybe nobodies lining up even to think about your needs, much less rushing to meet them. Perhaps the last couple of times you dared mention a need, you were disappointed. Read these verses and summarize the encouragement they give you to rely on God's love for your fulfillment:
Deuteronomy 7:7-9
The LORD did not set his love upon you, nor choose you, because ye were more in number than any people; for ye [were] the fewest of all people:But because the LORD loved you, and because he would keep the oath which he had sworn unto your fathers, hath the LORD brought you out with a mighty hand, and redeemed you out of the house of bondmen, from the hand of Pharaoh king of Egypt. Know therefore that the LORD thy God, he [is] God, the faithful God, which keepeth covenant and mercy with them that love him and keep his commandments to a thousand generations;

Deuteronomy 33:12
[And] of Benjamin he said, The beloved of the LORD shall dwell in safety by him; [and the LORD] shall cover him all the day long, and he shall dwell between his shoulders.

2 Timothy 2:13
If we believe not, [yet] he abideth faithful: he cannot deny himself.

1 John 4:18
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.


Question 8. And finally we reach step seven: I am now able to love others out of my own fulfillment.

Having our needs met by receiving the love of God and others is not just about "feeling better"
; it's about fulfillment . To fulfill means " to meet the requirements of , to satisfy." When the requirements of our soul---our needs-- are met, it satisfies us. This fulfillment produces inward peace, contentment, and healing for our wounds. As our wounds heal, we can turn away from them with a fresh passion, confidence, and love for others. ( Truefaced, page 95)

What are the "requirements" of our soul? What do you think it might look like for you to receive the love of God and find those requirements satisfied?

Question 9. ( Read pages 95-96)

Narrow your focus from the millions down to the handful of people in your sphere of influence who have yet to meet the King of Love. How does your life right now move or cause them to experience love ? Explain.

Chapter Four Week Five in the Guidebook pages 80-94
Today we will be on page 80 (Guidebook)
question 1. (read Truefaced, pages 83-84)
What are your early memories of receiving human love?
When I was taught how to read.
Of receiving God's love?
When He showed me an answer to a very troubling problem, in His word.
In our book it talks about Don's family. I thought Don was blessed to have a way to articulate how he saw the love of his family. I am sure so many of us can identify," Arrogance packaged as teaching, control disguised as protection; manipulation wrapped as concern; exploitation marketed as opportunities." Maybe not only in our natural family but how many times the people who become like brothers and sisters to me, have had these same characteristics.
Are your memories of receiving love from others (either in early life or more recently) more like Don's version? No. Explain. I think I shut down to receiving love some where , way back when ? I just didn't want to be loved , but of course what I really wanted was to be loved right. I just had given up. Then I opened up to God's love. If anyone can love right, it would have to be Him. It has changed my life. You now find me on a journey of hope that will give me a new nature that will be able to let others love me again. (As you will notice in my earlier writings, I have a big problem with saints that sin. Their sinning does affect their ability to love right. I will have to get over it. Just give me time. )

week 4 Accepting Others Questions
3. What might it cost you if you did what you think you need to do?
What will it cost me to change my motives ? Allowing the Holy Spirit to keep that object in the forefront , realizing that this need exists and still not pull back from God, this is a price. Truth costs something.

Now I will watch the closing video for week 4. The opening one was very inspirational. The book has just seemed to bring me deeper understanding as well. All the while these days that I am doing this, I am not being a grace giver. There is something about truth though, you see it for yourself, you see it for others. Rather than judge yourself or others you have to accept that God is the judge.

week 4 After watching the video : Accepting Others Questions
1. What is your greatest concern in accepting people in The Room of Grace who you know still sin? (You will think of specific people but please don't mention names.)

This really is a tough question to answer here. Behind my mask , the truth is I fear that if people are not warned, "don't sin, God doesn't like it," they will go to hell.
So it makes it very hard for me to welcome others into grace. It makes it impossible in fact.
There are times when I seem to be able to do a little bit better job. Times when I am confronted with a person whose sin is much like mine, that I have received grace for. I can give grace more easily and freely here.
But those myriad of sins that I have committed and still commit. Those sins that I imagine God is just putting up with. People who commit those sins I do not welcome into The Room of Grace. Those people only get reminded that they have sinned, and I am putting up with them.

question 2. What do you think you need to do differently in these relationships?
How can you change your actions to imitate God's actions in your relationships with Christians who sin? (Remember, motives lead to values, and values lead to actions.)

Now the first question, I would answer, that the answer seems simple enough.
For every person whom you are around who sins, imagine that you to do this sin and receive God's grace for it. (Not so easy, and not a plan that seems to be working by the way. This has been the plan for quite a while now.)
The second question intrigues me.
Actions, I thought it was putting confidence in actions that got me into the room of Good Intentions in the first place. But it says motives lead to values and values lead to actions. So what they are saying is that your motive behind the values will lead to a different kind of action than the kind I use to do.
I guess the right answer here is, change my motive. Maybe ask God to help me see just really what is my motive. My motives must be what has been tripping me up. I thought they were good but I can tell you just as near as Sunday afternoon they were not producing the actions of someone who ushers someone into the Room of Grace.

Week 4 PAGE 67 Question 10 (read in book pages 74-75)

Why do you think maturity is critically important for having influence in God's kingdom ?
My definition of maturity is being well on your way to understanding the "Goal" as laid out in our book. So you may need to read your book before you read this post if you haven't already.
The influence I want to have in God's kingdom is to bring others into His kingdom and help those who are wanting to walk in the fullness of His kingdom .
Having laid that foundation for you , maturity is critically important because if you are not maturing, you just are not in the game.
You can say, "I am reading my Bible everyday, I am being a doer of the word the best I can, I am praying everyday for God to help me." You can be going around and around in a circle that never ends.
I know in California there are steep mountains. As a child it would intrigue me that instead of just going straight up a mountain, up one side and down the other like a roller coaster, the highways would wind around. Sometimes it would seem that we were winding around to the other side of the mountain, then we would go back the other direction, climbing up higher and higher. Then at some point our winding road would start winding downward.
You can try to get over the mountain however you like, but at some point you have to say, "I am going to go on."
What I do not know is if it can be pushed on you , to do so.
A child, actually a baby, you carry that baby around, you give it milk, you take care of it's needs, if all things are working for that baby as God intended sooner or later it will get where it can take the sippy cup and give itself it's milk. Sooner or later it will learn how to walk. It will learn how to go to the bathroom, it will start taking care of it's needs.
Usually someone takes the time to help them hold the sippy cup. Someone helps them strengthen their legs by holding their hands and practice walking. Someone gives the needed instruction for using the bathroom.
To many times I think well meaning Christians act as if you should "get it" just by how long you have been a Christian. On the other hand just how do you instruct them to grow up ?
To me that is the call that Bill Thrall, Bruce McNicol, and John Lynch answered when they created Truefaced Experience. It is the manual for growing up in Christ Jesus. You might have found another way over the mountain, but this is mine.
Basically it is learning who you are . What is your identity in the Lord Jesus Christ and your destiny, the Kingdom of God.
Why is immaturity critically dangerous ?
I would say that the most dangerous part of being immature is the damage the devil might get to do. Jesus is our Shepherd and He takes care of His sheep, but if you do not understand that you are His sheep, under all circumstances, you may not know to call upon Him when you need help. That could put you in a very dangerous position.